


Me in 20 Years

by snowmansunflowers



Category: Memoir - Fandom, New Fandom - Fandom, No Fandom, monologue - Fandom, new characters - Fandom
Genre: BFFs, Best Friends, F/F, Friendship, Love, Nostalgia, Oneshot, Poetry, Random Characters - Freeform, Short Story, Spinoff, friends - Freeform, new characters - Freeform, y/n
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:53:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27991818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowmansunflowers/pseuds/snowmansunflowers
Summary: A one shot I've had in my notes for a while and really wanted to post, so here it is.  Very short and sweet, perhaps inspired by personal experience ;)Please listen to the song 'Me in 20 Years' by Moses Sumney. This song is so beyond beautiful; it inspired the story, and I hold it dear to my heart.Summary:Where Eva's finally moving in the right direction, one accomplishment at a time.
Relationships: best friends - Relationship





	Me in 20 Years

**Author's Note:**

> A one shot I've had in my notes for a while and really wanted to post, so here it is. Very short and sweet, perhaps inspired by personal experience ;)  
> Please listen to the song 'Me in 20 Years' by Moses Sumney. This song is so beyond beautiful; it inspired the story, and I hold it dear to my heart.

They're driving through the city at night for the first time. The lights twinkle idly all around them; the traffic is pleasurably for once; the views they've seen a thousand times before and no longer boring; everything seems high definition, new, and oh so beautiful. It's like they're seeing the city for the first time in their own eyes, and it's breathtaking. Ruby looks over at Eva when she hears her sniffling. She has a wistful look on her face as tears slide down her cheeks. She's crying.

"Hey hey what's wrong, pull over, why are you crying?" she asks her softly. Eva quickly pulls to the side and puts the car in park. She puts her head in her hands and weeps as Ellen slowly rubs her back, pulling her into her side as comfortably as possibly across the centre console. It's quiet all around them, save for the music playing softly though the car, and Eva trying to catch her breath. 

"Please, tell me what's wrong, Eva", Ellen asks again, pulling her face away from her hands. 

Eva laughs and shakes her head softly, "It's stupid", she starts after a shaky inhale. 

"Never. Now tell me, please?" 

"I'm happy." Eva says simply. Ellen pulls her eyebrows in confusion.  
"But you're crying?"

“They're tears of happiness, Ellen. I'm just...happy. I'm happy for myself, for getting my license." She explains, her lips pulling into a wobbly smile as she looks Ellen in the face finally. And she was happy. Her eyes, although sad, were sad with happiness. She was overwhelmed. 

Ellen nodded in understanding, and placed a tender kiss to her forward. "I'm happy too." she told her, gently wiping away her friends tears with her thumbs, holding her face close. 

"It's just...been so long since I've been happy for myself, you know? Like, I made myself happy." she lets out a shaky breath, "I'm...proud of myself. I don't remember the last time I did something right like this I just..." she trails off quietly, looking out the window, leaning back in her seat. 

Ellen was shocked to hear this. Of course she knows her friend is flippantly honest with her emotions. Both of them have had their own struggles with self preservation for too long. But to hear her say she was proud of herself, that she'd done something right, like it was something foreign, was absolutely heartbreaking. 

"Eva," she started, saying her name was so much conviction Eva immediately turned to look at her. "I wish you could see yourself how I see you." 

“And how is that?" Eva whispered. 

Ellen let out a shaky laugh and closed her eyes, "you know, one time, my mum said to me I look at you like you hung the stars in the sky." Eva smiled softly at that and looked down. 

“I don't know enough words to articulate a sentence explaining how much you mean to me. I don't even think there are enough words to describe how much you mean to me, in any language. You're so precious to me Eva. I wish you could see it. I've never met anyone like you before." Ellen told her earnestly, until Eva was blushing, reaching across the console to squeeze her hand. 

“They should write a story about us. I hope everyone gets to find their 'Ellen' one day. Whether they deserve it or not, I definitely don't." Eva tiredly rubbed her hands over her face and let them fall into her lap. 

"I just wish you knew." Ellen told her simply. 

“I wish I knew too," Eva told her sadly, "I wish i could see what you see. You make me want to love myself, because I see how much you love me and I think 'well, their must be something there, right?' I'm trying. Everyday. For you."

For the second time that night, Ellen's heart breaks.

"I want you to do it for yourself too. 'You are the universe experiencing itself' - I owe you more than the universe has to offer just for getting to sit here with you and tell you how you're my whole universe." 

At that Eva roughly pulls ruby across the console and hugs her so tight she feels winded. And they stay there comfortably, in that tight embrace, for as long as they need too, in their own world.


End file.
